Once upon a time there was this little girl at night it was pitch black. Her hair was dark as the night and she had bright blue eyes. She was trying to get fresh water at the well the light twitched she got frightened. She looked around but there was nothing there so she was still pulling on the rope.
The wind howled she let the rope go and went for a look she didn’t find anything. But then a mystical, magical and mysterious light shined on her. She blocked her eyes from the light then suddenly she saw this blue ghost. She screamed from the top of her lungs. The blue mysterious ghost jumped and got frightened then the ghost hid then he got up. And blew some sparkles over the girl she smiled the ghost picked up the bucket from the well and gave to her then he went back up into the sky.
I like that used paragraphs and punctuation and good expostulations
ReplyDeletenext time you should write and use more puncu aion
I like that you used comers at the right times
ReplyDeleteand full stops at the right time and that you used she screamed at the top of her lungs.
I liked that you used paragraphs and some action
ReplyDeletenext time you need to work on is your punctuation
I liked how you described in detail and told me.
ReplyDeleteNext time you can describe the girl and the monster.